Seeking Wisdom

Balancing earthly and spiritual wisdom is something I am definitely still working on.

I was raised in the church, but I had really just started attending again after the follies (read: laziness on Sunday morning) of my youth a couple of years before I started grad school. I was a baby Christian, very much scared of what entering a secular institution for an extended period of time would do to my faith. Such a mindset led me to be a bit more militant than perhaps was necessary, and I have modified my stance a lot. Although there are staunch atheists in grad school, and they all tell you who they are, for the most part, religion doesn’t come up in the context of teaching or discussing papers in seminars.

Where it does become an issue is behind the scenes. As I grew to understand how to look for the ‘underlying logic’ in someone’s argument and overall consistency or coherency in their ideological stance, I also started to apply that same measure to myself, to arguments that make up the fabric of my character.

Colossians 8-9 states,

See to it that no one takes you captive through philosophy and empty deception, according to the tradition of men, according to the elementary principles of the world, rather than according to Christ. For in Him all the fullness of Deity dwells in bodily form.

Those verses I read, circled, and underlined in my Bible study, pre-grad school days. Earthly wisdom is not the same as God’s wisdom. Got it. Done.

But of course figuring out the difference between those two in actual, applied living is not so easy. I recall hearing a debate about football players who pray (Go Tebow!) and the speculations of non-Christians regarding what it is they actually pray for before the big game. Are they praying that they will win, no matter what? What about the other Christians praying for the opposite on the other team? Does God pick favorites? The general consensus was no, God does not wear a specific jersey. Rather, the athletes are taking comfort in the knowledge of God, and they are praying that He will aid them in working with their God-given talent.

I use the above example because it illustrates to me the uneasy balance between knowledge of God’s preeminence over everything and our very human understanding of our skills and talents. Where is God stepping in and doing the work, and where is it you?

Similarly in grad school, I still haven’t figured out when it is God and when it’s me, and more importantly when I should care. I want to give glory to God in all things, but I also know that inspiration does not always come from God. We live the in the flesh, with its own form of wisdom and creativity. This can be a powerful source for good or not, depending on how it’s motivated. (I find it interesting that Stephanie Meyer never questioned where exactly she got her inspiration for Twilight). So when is my insight, based off of intensive study of French theorists, most often atheists or other shades of non-believers, glorifying God, and when is it veering away, glorifying the tricky things I can do with words instead?